Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Welcome to my blog, now get the fuck out

Who is that crazy Justicar character?  Why integralmath?  What's this bullshit all about? Why do you care?

I made an unwise decision a while back to consolidate my online presence. I chose unwisely, but since my gaming name is now most used, I'll stick with it.  You're welcome.

I have two blue eyes and one brown eye. Pictures of all three are on the internet.  Don't jizz on them please.

Integralmath is my youtube channel which I started to answer mathematics questions undergraduate students might have.  It's been a complete success since I have successfully answered like 3 questions. Perhaps one of them was correct. If you have math questions, e-mail me. If the question falls into the domain of what I give two shits about answering, I'll post a video on youtube with a detailed, incoherent and useless solution. A magic eightball (of crack!) will be right more often, but it's for free and you get what you pay for.

You can follow me on twitter: @integralmathyt - I never say anything useful there either, and both skepchickling and blahfaghater have blocked me there for no reason at all. 

I am starting this blog so that I can take advantage of the afterglow resulting from my most important achievement in life:  in Ireland, I once stood beside Rebecca Watson in an elevator. You might have heard about it!

About me: I'm a gamer by profession, and that's why I hate women. They make great healers, but always want to fucking tank.  I guess they like taking it in the face even though they should be in the rear with the queers and gear.  If you're a woman, please only play a mage since that class, like you, is only useful for making food and water.

Also, I love hatemail about my satire videos on youtube because I really plan on defending satirical arguments as though they're real. Emailing me about them to tell me you hate me and them is highly likely to get a response as that's my only purpose for existing.

By education I'm a mathematician. I'm really bad at it, and occasionally accidentally wind up in papers that get published. Usually, I'm listed as the 14th author so the other 13 authors can have a token faggot to prove the diversity in academia. I am grateful that the white woman dominated field includes me even if only for the lulz.  My area of expertise is in analytic geometry. In particular, projective geometry. I have no plans to blog about that because you're all probably too fucking stupid to understand it anyway, and it takes a lot of work to type shit. Since it's intricate work you won't understand, I'm not likely to waste my time trying to train any of you retarded monkeys.
At present, my area of interest in research is in anti-derivatives of maps which have no anti-derivatives. Numeric integration is a horribly inelegant technique. But it works well, so we use it. I am now trying to develop a mechanism by way of implicit integration to solve this unimportant problem that makes me lose sleep.  I am failing miserably and I want to say a special fuck you to Euler for not having been cleverer.  If any of this section makes sense to you, please leave now. I already know enough socially awkward virgins who haven't been properly medicated - no room for you.

Don't try to tell me math jokes because there aren't any fucking funny theorems *token nod to Tom Lehrer*.  Math is serious shit and people die quite frequently when it's fucked up.  So, if you have any funny stories about that, I might be willing to listen.

Rebecca "I Was Raped in an Elevator By a Gay Guy and then Abused a Helpless Audience Member" Watson and Jennifer "I Once Heard of Someone Being Raped in an Elevator and then I Lashed out and Hated Richard Dawkins for No Reason" McCreight both hate me.  You should therefore love me.

Tolerance will not be tolerated on this blog.  Offenders will be shot. Survivors will be shot again.  If that fails to kill you, you will be forced to listen to skepchick podcasta à la A clockwork Orange. Pick your poison, fuckers.

I've been discovered; the secret is out!  Leaving to this gumshoe to have tracked me down and then not be able to figure out if I'm serious or joking.  I mean, sheesh.  I thought it was obvious which one it was!


Anonymous said...

At a cursory look - probalby the most wonderful and useful blog on Earth.

Justicar said...

Well, please do NOT tell anyone out this blog. I might have to start putting effort into or something!

Spence said...

OK, for some reason my browser went nuts so I don't know if this posted. Trying again from a different browser... if this is a duplicate please delete!

Hey Justicar, good luck with the blog! Don't let the authoritarian twats get you down.

I dabbled with game theory a bit some years ago, but didn't spend enough time to get deeply into it or start developing my own ideas. Interesting topic though!

For some light relief, I did stumble across this example of UK humour, which I would like to stress is completely inappropriate given the current situation, and I don't find it at all funny or relevant. I only post it up to point out that people shouldn't be posting this type of stuff. Furthermore, all characters are fictional, and any resemblence to persons living or dead is purely coincidental.


Justicar said...

Nope. It appears to only have posted once. That's like three mouse clicks I don't have do today!

funny comic.

Well, they are certainly authoritarian, but not authorities. Why they think because PZ is well-educated, that posting on his blog makes them too escapes me.

"I have assertions!"

"Yeah, well, I have facts."

"Fuck your facts, raaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaapist!"

Marco the Beagle said...

VIZ! Oh, Spence, that brought back memories!

Also, Justicar, I have to say, your video had me pissin' meself laughing. You are strong in the ways of us Brits, as mockery is the only acceptable solution to pretty much anything, really.

Also, I have to ask... your name and the fact you're a gamer... fan of my second favourite asari?

Justicar said...

Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it. I will do some more serious blogging on Ms. Twatson as I finish running down and analyzing some data. I just happened to have gotten the JREF backstory practically handed to me on a silver platter. (The JREF people themselves aren't very helpful officially.) But, until I get more serious information that I can state with any degree of confidence, I'll just keep lambasting her.

You should know that whenever I'm writing any satire, I read it back over and Mrs. Slocum would say "weak as water", I kick it up a notch. At some point, I'm going to have start writing more, um, carefully - these blog posts and my youtube videos are normally like a second revision draft, if they're scripted at all. But people are starting to notice my work, so I guess it's time to play minimally competent or something.

No, I don't know that game. Odd enough, I got an e-mail last night announcing something about Age of Conan, which I could never figure out how to play anyway.

Marco the Beagle said...

Nah, sod writing carefully, go with your gut, I say. I always reckon it's best to say what you think, then no-one can accuse you of being dishonest. They may not LIKE what you say, and they may call you out in a public speech (sorry, had to go there), but that's their problem, innit?

Also, dammit, I thought I'd found another Mass Effect fan... lol

Justicar said...

I have decided to boycott any event that has Rebecca Twatson as a speaker, or invited guest, or puts her name on anything but a tag like everyone else. But, if I knew there were a chance for being called out publicly by her, I might reconsider.

She a two bit hack who hasn't had an original thought on anything near as I can tell. It would be of no moment to vivisect her.

She has victimhood and fans. I have intellect, wit and excellent aim.

How some half-wit like her ever got invited anywhere to give her views on science and skepticism remains a complete mystery.

Some of my clients play mass effect; maybe I'll take up playing with them sometime to see what it's like.

As it is, my gaming (I do it for a living) keeps my playing hours fairly well regulated.

Marco the Beagle said...

The point you make about those events is a good one, and it highlights a bigger problem: how many people who've never been to a sceptics' conference will now NEVER go to one in future (well, there's me, for one)?

I can't help but think she's done damage to ALL such events in future.

Justicar said...

Well, I don't want to ascribe to her that much ability. She really is a trivial nobody, but she's loud. And people listen to her. But she's still intellectually vacuous, and a half-trick pony.

I am unimpressed.

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BigErn said...

"Usually, I'm listed as the 14th author so the other 13 authors can have a token faggot to prove the diversity in academia."
Show Google Scholar profile or it didn't happen.

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